Fashion is the way I introduce myself to the world, every day, without saying anything.

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We received our first wedding present last week, which threw us totally off guard. We completely forgot about that exciting component of a wedding; even though we’ve been putting together a registry for months, suddenly it dawned on us – some of these things get to LIVE with us!

You know I like to think ahead – immediately I began brainstorming about thank you notes. Wedding thank you’s are ultimately the most important hand written notes you’ll ever have to write, don’t think you think? They’re prepped for months in advance, from stationary, to gift spreadsheets starting as early as the bridal shower. My mom is fastidious about manners and she has rubbed off on me, so I want to make sure I do everything right when it comes to the world series of thank you notes. If I may, here are my rules of etiquette when it comes to crafting the perfect thank you:

1. Say with your writing, not the card – This is something my mom taught me. For whatever reason, she prefers to use a blank card with artwork on the front rather than a card that says “Thank you.” I never quite understood why, but now that I’m an “adult,” the sight of a card with “Thank you” across the front just looks wrong, a little tacky even. Sending a blank card is like sending a tiny piece of artwork, wouldn’t it be fun to frame a few?

2. Time Frame – Guests have one year to send wedding gifts, and thank you notes should be sent within 3 months of receiving that gift. People just want to know you received it, so the speedier, the better.

3. Format – Always mention what the person gave you, followed by the way in which you intend to use the gift. “Thank you so much for the lovely glasses. We plan to use them to host our first ever Thanksgiving this year.” If it’s appropriate, I like to include a fond memory of the recipient as well. How good does receiving a card like that feel?

4. Custom Stationary – This isn’t a rule so much as just a great excuse. Once you’re married, invest in some stationary. Use that customized stationary (maybe with your new last name??) for your thank you notes. Etsy has some incredible artists who are reasonably priced and will do this for you no problem. You are so fancy and polite.








photo by Julia Elizabeth.

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